Cold blows the wind.

"CalzoneGolem" (calzonegolem) 11/30/2015 at 12:07 • Filed to: Bullmobile

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It’s that time of year when things start to freeze to death. I noticed on my ride in that my car is blowing out moderately warm air. Plenty of air being moved so I’ll replace the thermostat and see if that helps.

Seat Safety Switch > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 12:12

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Fuck This God Damned Piece of Shit, A Tragedy In Three Parts

By William Seat Safety Switch III, Esq.

Act One

Forsooth, fair maiden! It is as cold as a witch’s teat in here! I believe I will turn my heater control dial to HOT.

Act Two

The heater control cable snaps free from the knob with an audible POP. The dial spins freely, severed from an actuator deep inside the dashboard.

Act Three

Replacement control cables cost $369 apiece and are NLA.

CalzoneGolem > Seat Safety Switch 11/30/2015 at 12:14

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After reading this I said, “Fuck that shit!” out loud and got the evil eye from some coworkers.

Seat Safety Switch > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 12:16

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The best part is on Saturday I visited an identical car at the junkyard, saw that the entire HVAC system had been removed from the dashboard with the cables deliciously exposed.

“No,” I said, “I don’t need those.”

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 12:16

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KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 12:19

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Or you have a 2000 A4 with a bubble of coolant in the heater core. There is that.

Don’t ask how I know about that...Fucking VWs...

CalzoneGolem > KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs 11/30/2015 at 12:21

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Yeah I’m hoping not to have to do a flush.

CalzoneGolem > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 11/30/2015 at 12:21

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RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs 11/30/2015 at 12:26

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Cars should have more than one heater core. That way it doesn’t matter if you have a bubble in one. #InsaneTrollLogic

CalzoneGolem > Seat Safety Switch 11/30/2015 at 12:28

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Well shoot at least you know where to get them now!

deekster_caddy > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 12:45

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If the engine comes up to normal operating temp look at some other things before the thermostat. Air in the system, try hooking a garden hose up to the heater core and make sure it flows freely. Blend doors? (what car is this)

I replaced the heater core in my ‘73 this summer and the replacement was aluminum instead of copper, and noticeably thinner than the original, and the heat is hot but not super hot like it used to be... coolant temps are still the same.

deekster_caddy > Seat Safety Switch 11/30/2015 at 12:45

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always the way it goes down... always.

ttyymmnn > KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs 11/30/2015 at 12:52

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You want to bitch about VW heat? Okay. The blend door on my ‘01 Golf is a metal plate full of holes (lightness added?) covered in foam insulation. Just about every bit of glue in the car has given up its grip, and over the last few years, all that insulation from the blend door has blown out of the vents. Now, even with the blend door fully closed, all those wonderful little holes just let in all the cold air. Instead of “heat” I have “tepid.” It can be fixed, but it requires disassembling the entire dashboard. Thank god I live in Texas.

CalzoneGolem > deekster_caddy 11/30/2015 at 12:58

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2004 Ford Taurus. The thermostat is like $7 and 2 bolts so I’ll give that a try first haha.

KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs > ttyymmnn 11/30/2015 at 13:38

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In my case the Audi was leaking water from the windshield seal (not coolant) and did a number on the electronics behind the dash, so it may end up being beyond repair, but as long as a digital race dashboard can grab the info from the ODBII port, it should function as a race car...

ttyymmnn > KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs 11/30/2015 at 13:39

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Because race car.

Sam > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 13:55

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Surprisingly enough, the ‘78 924 has heat that works flawlessly. In fact, it gets a little too hot and the controls are very difficult to use.

deekster_caddy > CalzoneGolem 11/30/2015 at 15:42

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Sounds good. Go for the cheap and easy if it’s cheap and easy. Does that Taurus have the steel pipe from the lower radiator hose to the water pump? If so, watch for it rusting out. I know they had that in the ‘00.